On Why Staying Single Is Enough

      (I somehow need to give a shout out to all Tiktok #couplegoals for  inspiring me to write this blog because I don't really like seeing couples dancing together (SWEETLY!!!). I don't have Tiktok, not a fan. It just happen that Tiktok culture is everywhere, blogging is the only safe space where I can stay away from cringe.) 

     Admittedly 20's something is one of the hardest phase in life because it is at this point where you'll feel vulnerable and fragile. People often get lost, misguided, undervalued, and crazy. We have this need to share our burdens with someone other than our own. We wanted someone to tell us things will be alright soon, negativity is not long-lasting. We wanted to feel secured, protected, and valued despite the failure that we've been. We longed for somebody who's gonna ease our pain away and embrace us for all our imperfections. Somebody who would understand our mind as well as our hearts. 

       If you're 20 something, and you're still single, you might think I'm correct. Indeed, what we really need is someone who'd guard us in our emptiness. It is partly true, I guess. I would often catch myself questioning how on Earth I stayed single the entire time when truth is, I'm lonely and sad and I needed someone to make me happy. Admittedly, your familial love, friendship love, pet love wouldn't sate it. You would feel the need to find someone to whom you can bear your soul with. And you're not lucky because you're 20 something and you've got none. I'm with you.

      Being a single lady is not cool. It sucks. It would lead you to assumptions that you're unloved and unappreciated. Despite people telling you you're not. Screw them. I feel alone and lonely most of the time and it actually sucks (second time for "suck") because clearly, there is nothing more satisfying and beautiful when you're with the person who makes you feel you're an inspiration. 

     But when you look at all of it, you've been brave. 

     You're brave because you fought all of it alone. Unworthy, unloved, unappreciated? You fought all of it alone. You're lonely, alone, sad? You fought all of it alone. You're afraid because someone is not there to jump the rope with you? You jumped with the rope alone and that's okay. That's brave. You fought all of it. You are a queen. 

     I don't think I will need a man to make me function as a woman. I don't think I will need a man to make me feel I am beautiful. I don't think I would need a man to share my burdens with. I don't think I would feel the need to be embraced by my imperfections. I did it on my own, anyway. I am strong on my own.  

      I am writing this because I wanted to speak in behalf of feminism, clearly I'm not. I am speaking in behalf of people who have been told they're weak for having nothing and no one. I am writing to tell them it's fine, don't worry. You pat your back and walk again. You are not someone's damsel in distress. You are your own damsel in distress. And you have to fight with your courage and braveness. So keep doing what you think is right for you. 

     On why staying a single woman is enough? Maybe because I am my own self and I am responsible for it. 

(I do not intend to stay single forever though but I do think I'm full to let someone occupy some space.)